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Jan Flynn

Life After Loss

Learning to live past grief: a podcast episode not to miss

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Photo by Mohamed Nohassi on Unsplash

Whether or not you believe in a soul that survives physical death — some form of consciousness that moves on to another realm of existence, or perhaps diffuses into a higher, unseen plane of the one we already occupy — is a matter of faith or philosophy.

No matter how firmly you may be convinced, as I am, that when the curtain drops on our time on Earth’s stage, we go on to play other roles, the fact is that nobody really knows.

Except for, maybe, those who have had NDEs, near-death experiences, and even they aren’t exactly in a position to prove it.

But what we do know is that if we live long enough, we will encounter the loss of people we love. For many of us, especially as we age, our concern is not so much about whether we ourselves will still be around in some form after we kick the bucket.

What we worry about — even if we really don’t like to talk about it — is how in the world we’re supposed to survive the death of someone who is so important to us that we can’t imagine living without them.

Luckily, there are those who can help guide us through grief

Like other monumental passages in life, like birth or falling in love, loss is both individual and universal. And like other significant life events, the attendant pain is usually lessened if we don’t go through it alone.

That’s why this post is really a plug — because I think what I’m pitching here is truly worthwhile.

On the Crow’s Feet: Life As We Age podcast episode that releases on July 12, 2023, I have the opportunity to interview Lenore Guido, who has over 45 years of experience in counseling those dealing with loss.

Besides having her own private counseling practice focusing on compassionate grief care, Lenore also serves as the Bereavement Coordinator for a hospital-based hospice program in New Jersey.

She is also currently writing a book about recovering from loss and finding a way to live fully without either hiding from sorrow or getting stuck in it, and growing through grief.

Having become a sudden, shocked widow at the age of 48 when my first husband died of sudden cardiac arrest, I found Lenore’s perspective on the experience of deep loss to not only ring true but to be comforting — and encouraging.

Our conversation is, for lack of a better word, surprisingly lively. As Lenore illustrates, there is no right or wrong way to experience grief. But if we are able to both face loss and integrate it, we can discover strengths in ourselves beyond what we ever expected.

We can become more compassionate — towards ourselves and others — and we can learn to savor the gift of life, while we have it, even more fully.

And yes, we can laugh again. We can find joy. We can even love again.

Take it from me, and especially take it from Lenore, who is walking her talk. Check out the Crow’s Feet podcast episode beginning on July 12, available on Apple, Spotify, Stitcher, and all major platforms.

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